A sailor goes into a "latrine" just in time to see a Marine finishing up...
thinks he'll get some digs in...
says, "In the Navy, they teach us to wash our hands when we're done!"
Marine says "In the Marine Corps, they teach us not to piss on our hands."
A sailor goes into a restaurant and a kid runs up to him...
"Sailor! Sailor!  Can I wear your hat?"
so he lets the little guy run around with it...
A Marine walks in and the little kid comes up to him...
"Marine! Marine!  Can I wear your hat?"
"Fuck off!" says the Marine
"Oh, I'm not a real sailor... I'm just wearing his hat!
"